Completely Fictional

Here's a bit more about me, Zack Schuster

I'm a 28-year-old enby, formerly of The Midwest, currently moonlighting as a dead prussian general in California.

Fun fact: I used to be in the Army National Guard, specifically a public affairs specialist.

When I was in training, one of my instructors said that inside every novelist is a cheap philosopher. It's true. (Also, this next paragraph has a lot of 'I's in it.)

I like writing all kinds of things, especially stories and essays. I'm very conversational and self-deprecating; I like making people smile, and I try to say familiar things in new ways. I try to be positive a lot, but a lot of times I get really anxious instead because there are a lot of awful things in the world and it's impossible for me to fix even a small portion of them. As a result, I try to end everything I write with either "Everything will be alright" or "I hope you have a wonderful life," because it makes me smile and I hope it'll make you smile too.

I love the semicolon; however, my love is unrequited. I find solace — however fleeting — in the arms of the hyphen.


Let's call this part a "potpourri" because that seems like fun

*smiles for the non-existent camera*